stand TALL

Be confident, walk proudly and be true to yourself.

Let’s face it. As parents, we don’t always think about the self-esteem of our youngsters. After all, the child who is willing to strip down in public obviously doesn’t have body image issues and the kid who brags they are faster than Flash clearly has a good opinion about their speed.

Your child’s self-esteem is actually very important to their health. Studies show that self-esteem is established before age 5, and is strongly linked to their personalities. It’s not yet clear how this might affect their futures, but we know that adults with low self-esteem are less successful than those with high self-esteem.

Ideally, we want our children to be their true, authentic selves. Children who are confident in themselves are more willing to try new things, and are less likely to hide who they are. As parents, we can help guide them down a positive path, and here’s how.


tell your children you love them… all the time
Children need to know that they are loved, and not just because they got an A on a test or won a soccer game. Tell your child you love them frequently, and don’t tie it to any act that they perform. When children know they are loved absolutely, they are more willing to be themselves and to trust that being who they are is just fine.

don’t criticize them when they are themselves
It’s natural for young children to be exuberant and loud—that’s who they are. When you need a moment of quiet and in a moment of frustration yell, “Can’t you just be a good boy and settle down?!” You’re essentially telling them that who they are actually isn’t okay.

Instead, when you need to ask for a change in behavior be careful to word things so they don’t attack their sense of being. “I need some quiet time. Can you show me your super quiet ninja skills?” Might be a better response. (And lead to a whole lot of fun practice sneaking around being a somewhat quieter ninja.)


model authenticity
We parents tend to spend a lot of time researching the best way to raise our children, yet we often don’t take this very good advice for ourselves. Did you put your passions on hold to raise your kids? It may be time to take up your interests again, and if possible bring your children into them too.

Did you always want to be a dog trainer? Have your child learn to handle dogs with you, and let them know this is your true self. When they see you are okay with being yourself, they’ll be more confident in exploring their own interests.

Being our true, authentic selves is something everyone on Earth should strive for. Hiding who we are and simply trying to conform to everyday standards causes stagnation and a very boring world. Help your child to stand tall, knowing that who they are is a pretty amazing person to be, through the power of your love.

books to encourage kids to stand tall
There are some pretty awesome books to help teach children to stand tall and be themselves. A few favorites include Stand Tall Molly Lou Melon by Patty Lovell which tells the story of a tiny girl who (with the encouragement of her grandmother) shares her big smiles, walks proudly and sings loudly, Good Little Wolf by Nadia Shireen is about a young wolf named Rolf who, in contrast to the other big bad wolves, prefers to be kind and good, Not Your Typical Dragon by Dan Bar-el follows a similar approach of storytelling through an adorable and unusual little dragon named Crispin, who unlike other fire-breathing dragons produces things like whip cream and teddy bears!


coloring fun
Please enjoy this free Tot Tails coloring page to help share this message with your child.


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